I am feeling so restless lately. I need a healthy dose of Yonder, but I've not been online much lately to be able to catch her on MSN. I need to, I really want a good laugh at the moment.
I don't know why I feel so stressed out. If I look at my life, nothing's really wrong with it. I'm happy, there's nothing bothering me, but many things are bothering my mind. Quite a number of friends of mine have problems at the moment, and they come to me to talk and let me listen to what they're feeling. I might not be a good advisor, but I can be a good listener. Most of my friends have problems at the moment, but my life is just as how it is. Maybe it's got to do with my name? "Maisarah" means "easy" and "richness" so maybe that destined me to an easy life?
I don't know.
The question is, my friends are the one with problems, so why am I feeling like this?
I don't know what I want, or what's bothering my mind. I just know that I'm feeling very restless, that I think my sleep has not been treating me well, and I want to do something but I have no idea what it is. Pretty confusing, huh? It's more confusing for me. Over the past few weeks, I've stopped my NaNo at 25,000 words. I've started my classes, made some new friends with the juniors of Pre-Law. I've created a website from Google Sites that's still under construction where I just decide to gather all the stories I've written before. I don't wanna rely too much on Fictionpress because it always goes under maintenance. I've also done some tweaks for my laptop, making it go faster, look nicer, all that stuff.
At the moment, I'm hunting for book clubs. Do you know that the average Malaysian reader only reads two books per year? Honestly, that's so depressing. It's just too depressing. I'm glad I chose that topic as my term paper, just because I'm now turning into one of those people who wants to make a difference in life. Tell me something, if I make a book club for Malaysians, will you join? Let me know, and I'll think about it.
I want to do something big. For some reason, I feel as though my life is just very insignificant at the moment. I'm the lucky girl, the one who entered university at the age of sixteen while my friends were all eighteen. I'm the girl who has been to England and learned different things and different cultures. The girl with the happy life, no problems, all that jazz. I don't want that. I feel like I'm living my life as a puppet, and I'm not making decisions, and that I'm not doing anything. I reeaaally hate that. Regardless of what I am, I want to do something and my fingers are itching for it - anything.
I should set up a book club, that's what I'm thinking. If not an online one, then one in real life. Maybe I'm too late if I want to set up a book club at UiTM Kedah, but I might be able to do so once I'm in Shah Alam.
I can blame hormones for my rather weird train of thoughts, but that's too easy. Maybe it is hormones though, that teenage curse we all go through eventually. Haha. All I know, I'm feeling stressed for no reason whatsoever, and I'm not liking it. I'm gonna put on some hard rock songs now, and just get on with the work I'm supposed to do. After I'm done with that, I'll see what other plans I have of changing the world.
I can be so silly when the mood strikes me.
Friday, December 4, 2009
Friday, November 20, 2009
NaNoWriMo Crisis
It's the 20th, and I'm currently on... well, veeery near 21k. How did I let that happen? I've got ten days to write 30k, preferably more. An average of 3k a day, which sounds simple enough, but heck. It's been a rough week. I had time to write, but I didn't, basically. Which sucks.
The new semester has started, and it's going very well at the moment. I'm enjoying it. The only class which hasn't started is the Global Issues one, due to the lecturer not being here for a few weeks to come for some reason. Oh well. As for the rest, it's all great. I got a higher GPA than I did last semester, thankfully, but I've totally slacked Law for both semesters. I've decided to take English for Professional Communication as my degree. Pursue the publishing company or becoming a lecturer. Or whatever else would come to me - working is something that I've not thought about yet. All I want is a degree with a wide enough range for me to do different jobs.
I'll be going home next weekend to celebrate Eid ul-Adha with my family. I can't wait for that, there's so much to tell them!
Another thing which I didn't mention was my MUET exam. The speaking examination went horribly wrong, but the rest were alright enough. I sat them on a Saturday, and didn't come home afterwards because there was just one week left, and I'd wanted to come back for Eid. But instead of going home, a rather spur-of-the-moment decision led me and my auntie's family to Pulau Langkawi. It's one of Malaysia's top tourist sites, an island with mountains and more little islands where you could go and see the sharks. Went on the cable car up to Mount Mat Cincang, 710 metres above sea level.
Something you should know about Mount Mat Cincang is that there's always a trail visible leading down, through the forest. And knowing me, I really, really, really, really, really wanted to go down that trail. It's a dirt trail, and I just wonder where it'll take me. I miss these forest-exploring experiences. I went and explored the trail a little, and it goes waaay down. I wanted to go through it, but my auntie's family weren't sure of the idea, so we took the cable car again down to the ground. Saw a black and white eagle, very beautiful.
I fed rabbits and deers as well. The deers are awesome. I expected them to run, but I never expected them to come towards me. And though they're rather small deers, they are very heavy. They stepped on my toes several times... like OUCH! But I loved them too much to scold them. The rabbits were awesome, but I've fed rabbits in a rabbit farm before. They're so adorable!
Speaking of rabbits and deers, I have a new cat. At home, and I can't wait to play with her. A neighbour of ours was moving houses, so they decided to let us take care of the cat instead. Her name is 'C Bulat' which means 'Round', basically. She's so fat. I thought she was pregnant when I first saw her, but she's adorable and likes to play around. And she likes to bite, which scares most of my family members. Piccie:
Other news...? I think I have none. Tune in for more, next time!
Riiino
The new semester has started, and it's going very well at the moment. I'm enjoying it. The only class which hasn't started is the Global Issues one, due to the lecturer not being here for a few weeks to come for some reason. Oh well. As for the rest, it's all great. I got a higher GPA than I did last semester, thankfully, but I've totally slacked Law for both semesters. I've decided to take English for Professional Communication as my degree. Pursue the publishing company or becoming a lecturer. Or whatever else would come to me - working is something that I've not thought about yet. All I want is a degree with a wide enough range for me to do different jobs.
I'll be going home next weekend to celebrate Eid ul-Adha with my family. I can't wait for that, there's so much to tell them!
Another thing which I didn't mention was my MUET exam. The speaking examination went horribly wrong, but the rest were alright enough. I sat them on a Saturday, and didn't come home afterwards because there was just one week left, and I'd wanted to come back for Eid. But instead of going home, a rather spur-of-the-moment decision led me and my auntie's family to Pulau Langkawi. It's one of Malaysia's top tourist sites, an island with mountains and more little islands where you could go and see the sharks. Went on the cable car up to Mount Mat Cincang, 710 metres above sea level.
Something you should know about Mount Mat Cincang is that there's always a trail visible leading down, through the forest. And knowing me, I really, really, really, really, really wanted to go down that trail. It's a dirt trail, and I just wonder where it'll take me. I miss these forest-exploring experiences. I went and explored the trail a little, and it goes waaay down. I wanted to go through it, but my auntie's family weren't sure of the idea, so we took the cable car again down to the ground. Saw a black and white eagle, very beautiful.
I fed rabbits and deers as well. The deers are awesome. I expected them to run, but I never expected them to come towards me. And though they're rather small deers, they are very heavy. They stepped on my toes several times... like OUCH! But I loved them too much to scold them. The rabbits were awesome, but I've fed rabbits in a rabbit farm before. They're so adorable!
Speaking of rabbits and deers, I have a new cat. At home, and I can't wait to play with her. A neighbour of ours was moving houses, so they decided to let us take care of the cat instead. Her name is 'C Bulat' which means 'Round', basically. She's so fat. I thought she was pregnant when I first saw her, but she's adorable and likes to play around. And she likes to bite, which scares most of my family members. Piccie:
Pretty, isn't she? She likes to eat raw fish and cat food, basically. And she's very clever, though she's quite heavy. And she hates the collar around her neck, which didn't exist when I took that photo, I believe.
Other news...? I think I have none. Tune in for more, next time!
Riiino
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Happy (?) Anniversary
Well... I'm currently rather speechless. Hit a writer's block before I even started typing. I was waiting to write this entry, since a few days ago. Just because it has been one full year since 31st October 2008, since I boarded that plane from Manchester on my trip home, here in Malaysia. And a year after my life in the UK, what can I say..?
A lot, but then again, nothing much.
Since I came back, I've met the best person in my life. I've now completed two semesters of my Pre-Degree. Tomorrow (technically anyway), I will start NaNoWriMo for the first time in my life - something I've wanted to do for so long, but only got the chance now. I've (recently) learned how to cook, slowly. Learned how to sew. I've got myself interested in Malaysian novels. I've been writing less (sadly), and I've been less active with my internet life (thankfully, actually).
To be quite honest, there's so much to sum up when you have a year of your life. Sometimes I think back, and I can't believe how much I miss my old life. But I never regret. The things that have happened to me shaped me to become who I am now, and I'm grateful. I miss a lot of stuff, but I've been living that life to my fullest (especially in my last year there) and there's nothing I would change if I ever got the chance to go back. I miss everything about Hinde House. I miss the 10 pence mocca drink I always get from the vending machine at work. I miss so much things there. I miss Mr. Case most of all.
Mom went to me the other day, asked me if I wanted to study abroad for my degree... say New Zealand or Australia - somewhere in the USA. I used to dream about that. It used to be my ambition, something I really want. But for so many reasons, after coming back to Malaysia, I decided that I don't want to be an overseas graduate. I don't. I want to stay here and be with the people I love most. I won't regret it. I've had the experience of living abroad, studying there and stuff... but that's nothing compared to home. Despite all the rants, I love this place.
There's only one regret I have since I came back to Malaysia - I don't think I'm living my life enough. I'm not appreciating everything as I should do, as I wanted to. And this is my wake up call, to start appreciating everything. Every moment, every second. I want to learn many things, do many things, read many books. And I've always wasted my time doing absolutely nothing, which is shameful. Until a few days ago, when I started learning how to sew. And now I'm even altering some of my clothes to fit me nicely. Plus I've finished my first and second baju kurung, which is an awesome feeling. I forget how good it feels to be able to accomplish something. So I wanna change that.
Starting tomorrow, I'll be busy with NaNoWriMo. I'll (hopefully) find my passion for writing again, and I'll write and write and write. At the same time, I'll try my best to achieve the best. Listen to Nickelback's "If Today Was Your Last Day". It does wonders for me every time I listen to it.
Live life to the max. I've always said that, no matter what.
A lot, but then again, nothing much.
Since I came back, I've met the best person in my life. I've now completed two semesters of my Pre-Degree. Tomorrow (technically anyway), I will start NaNoWriMo for the first time in my life - something I've wanted to do for so long, but only got the chance now. I've (recently) learned how to cook, slowly. Learned how to sew. I've got myself interested in Malaysian novels. I've been writing less (sadly), and I've been less active with my internet life (thankfully, actually).
To be quite honest, there's so much to sum up when you have a year of your life. Sometimes I think back, and I can't believe how much I miss my old life. But I never regret. The things that have happened to me shaped me to become who I am now, and I'm grateful. I miss a lot of stuff, but I've been living that life to my fullest (especially in my last year there) and there's nothing I would change if I ever got the chance to go back. I miss everything about Hinde House. I miss the 10 pence mocca drink I always get from the vending machine at work. I miss so much things there. I miss Mr. Case most of all.
Mom went to me the other day, asked me if I wanted to study abroad for my degree... say New Zealand or Australia - somewhere in the USA. I used to dream about that. It used to be my ambition, something I really want. But for so many reasons, after coming back to Malaysia, I decided that I don't want to be an overseas graduate. I don't. I want to stay here and be with the people I love most. I won't regret it. I've had the experience of living abroad, studying there and stuff... but that's nothing compared to home. Despite all the rants, I love this place.
There's only one regret I have since I came back to Malaysia - I don't think I'm living my life enough. I'm not appreciating everything as I should do, as I wanted to. And this is my wake up call, to start appreciating everything. Every moment, every second. I want to learn many things, do many things, read many books. And I've always wasted my time doing absolutely nothing, which is shameful. Until a few days ago, when I started learning how to sew. And now I'm even altering some of my clothes to fit me nicely. Plus I've finished my first and second baju kurung, which is an awesome feeling. I forget how good it feels to be able to accomplish something. So I wanna change that.
Starting tomorrow, I'll be busy with NaNoWriMo. I'll (hopefully) find my passion for writing again, and I'll write and write and write. At the same time, I'll try my best to achieve the best. Listen to Nickelback's "If Today Was Your Last Day". It does wonders for me every time I listen to it.
Live life to the max. I've always said that, no matter what.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Baking? Cooking..? Sewing..? O.O
Well, it's nearing midnight now... actually, cross that. My laptop just showed 00:00.
SO. Well. What's news with little Rino-chan since she last wrote her entry? Hmm... let's see. Well, I know. I've gone to uni and back for the course of four days last week, which had been a really, really awesome four days. Boredom has a significant role in that awesomeness I felt.
Apart from that, I've been busy at home. Two days ago, my dad brought me and my mom down to the nearest town, and we got some cloth. Mom's teaching me how to sew. Regardless of the fact that I'm a Malaysian girl turning eighteen very soon, I am very much incapable of doing the "housewife" work, as I'd put it. I'd clean and such, but more than that and you'd get me baffled, so I'm working on that. Sewing takes up a large agenda of my everyday at the moment. I got two sets of cloth, and mom got two sets. The first set was simply cotton. White cloth, with small blue flowers and green leaves. Very, very sweet. And the second was pretty... beautiful even. I'm working on making the traditional baju kurung at the moment, and the blouse would be plain cream, with a blue/green Indonesian kain batik.
I've done the first baju kurung's blouse at the moment. The cloth was supposed to be for me, but somehow my youngest sister fell in love with it. So I gave it to her. When I'm done with the skirt (which I should be tomorrow), I'll proceed in making my own... this time, hopefully, without the need of my mom's guidance. I can learn quickly if I need to (why isn't it the same with my classes? D8) and I can't wait to give it a try. If I can master doing that, I'll learn how to sew other things quickly afterwards.
Next, cooking. Eastern dishes are always a problem for me, even though I can do western just fine. So I've been shadowing my mom in the kitchen every evening, helping her prepare dinner. It's been wonderful so far. Tragedies, misfortunes, accidents, horror... one after another, name your adjectives. But at least I'm learning. I'm learning and I'm learning, and I'm enjoying how I'm spending my time. Which is weird, because there's about three days left for NaNo. I realise that I hardly spend any time with the internet anymore, not like old times. I definitely have shaken off that habit.
Lastly, baking. I've always loved to bake, I just hardly ever do it. Now I want to make it a habit every time I go home. I did brownies last week, and I loved those. It was supposed to be a cake, but somehow turned into brownies. xD Oh well. I realised that it wouldn't be the typical spongy cake before I started, but I never expected it to turn out like how it did. But it tastes wonderful. I loved it. Dad and my youngest sister won't say much. Just watch. I'll impress them further. I've got requests to do the all-time lemon meringue pie, and I think I'll do that. I'm also thinking of cookies and muffins/cupcakes to take back with me to campus when I get back on the 7th.
Oh yes. News to you all. I'm not going back on the 15th, but 7th. Financial issues win in the end, and I don't want to make that trip back. I'm thinking about how difficult it may be. And I really, really, really hope that no new intake Pre-Law students would use my room during the orientation. You never know when it comes to UiTM. They like to make surprises.
Manchester United tonight, going against Barnsley. I can't wait. Can I mention that the last fight against Liverpool sucked, purely because the Liverpool players were all taking advantage of the silly Man U-hater referree? Liverpool might not have won if not for the referree. Most of their players should have been sent off with red cards and red faces. Especially Carragher (though he did get the red card much too late by the [insert bad word here] referree), Lucas and Kuyt. I loved the Man Utd fans at Anfield though. Those large beach balls thrown in the middle of the field was very funny. Kudos for Sunderland and their legendary goal.
Tonight!
Rino.
SO. Well. What's news with little Rino-chan since she last wrote her entry? Hmm... let's see. Well, I know. I've gone to uni and back for the course of four days last week, which had been a really, really awesome four days. Boredom has a significant role in that awesomeness I felt.
Apart from that, I've been busy at home. Two days ago, my dad brought me and my mom down to the nearest town, and we got some cloth. Mom's teaching me how to sew. Regardless of the fact that I'm a Malaysian girl turning eighteen very soon, I am very much incapable of doing the "housewife" work, as I'd put it. I'd clean and such, but more than that and you'd get me baffled, so I'm working on that. Sewing takes up a large agenda of my everyday at the moment. I got two sets of cloth, and mom got two sets. The first set was simply cotton. White cloth, with small blue flowers and green leaves. Very, very sweet. And the second was pretty... beautiful even. I'm working on making the traditional baju kurung at the moment, and the blouse would be plain cream, with a blue/green Indonesian kain batik.
I've done the first baju kurung's blouse at the moment. The cloth was supposed to be for me, but somehow my youngest sister fell in love with it. So I gave it to her. When I'm done with the skirt (which I should be tomorrow), I'll proceed in making my own... this time, hopefully, without the need of my mom's guidance. I can learn quickly if I need to (why isn't it the same with my classes? D8) and I can't wait to give it a try. If I can master doing that, I'll learn how to sew other things quickly afterwards.
Next, cooking. Eastern dishes are always a problem for me, even though I can do western just fine. So I've been shadowing my mom in the kitchen every evening, helping her prepare dinner. It's been wonderful so far. Tragedies, misfortunes, accidents, horror... one after another, name your adjectives. But at least I'm learning. I'm learning and I'm learning, and I'm enjoying how I'm spending my time. Which is weird, because there's about three days left for NaNo. I realise that I hardly spend any time with the internet anymore, not like old times. I definitely have shaken off that habit.
Lastly, baking. I've always loved to bake, I just hardly ever do it. Now I want to make it a habit every time I go home. I did brownies last week, and I loved those. It was supposed to be a cake, but somehow turned into brownies. xD Oh well. I realised that it wouldn't be the typical spongy cake before I started, but I never expected it to turn out like how it did. But it tastes wonderful. I loved it. Dad and my youngest sister won't say much. Just watch. I'll impress them further. I've got requests to do the all-time lemon meringue pie, and I think I'll do that. I'm also thinking of cookies and muffins/cupcakes to take back with me to campus when I get back on the 7th.
Oh yes. News to you all. I'm not going back on the 15th, but 7th. Financial issues win in the end, and I don't want to make that trip back. I'm thinking about how difficult it may be. And I really, really, really hope that no new intake Pre-Law students would use my room during the orientation. You never know when it comes to UiTM. They like to make surprises.
Manchester United tonight, going against Barnsley. I can't wait. Can I mention that the last fight against Liverpool sucked, purely because the Liverpool players were all taking advantage of the silly Man U-hater referree? Liverpool might not have won if not for the referree. Most of their players should have been sent off with red cards and red faces. Especially Carragher (though he did get the red card much too late by the [insert bad word here] referree), Lucas and Kuyt. I loved the Man Utd fans at Anfield though. Those large beach balls thrown in the middle of the field was very funny. Kudos for Sunderland and their legendary goal.
Tonight!
Rino.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Aren't They Adorable?
Well, it's been a while. After much thinking, I've more or less made the 80% decision that I'd be taking on English for Professional Communication as my degree. Most probably, not yet thoroughly decided. I've still quite a lot of time to think it through completely. But one thing I really want is to study up to my Masters. It's just one more year after the degree, and I'm really liking the idea. The degree would take about three years, and then another year for Masters = four years in total. I'm seventeen. I'll be eighteen next year. Eighteen + four = Probably twenty-two years old by the time I graduate, with a Masters. I like the sound of that. I'll pray that it'll happen, because that's where I want to go. Either become a lecturer or work for a company, that's still undecided.
Anyway, I finally got the Eid pictures off from my dad yesterday. I've no intention of putting them here except by request, but I do wish to introduce two newest members of my extended family. Hear hear!
This here is little Alif. Turning nine months old, on my mom's side. Seriously, he's adorable. And it's so great to have a little one in the family - I think we all missed having a little toddler around and such. Especially me. How I love kids.
Below, reaching two years old (if I'm not mistaken), Aiman. From my dad's side. Now he's too special. xD He's my cousin's son, first new generation, and also the youngest in the family now. Again, missing the little toddlers around, everyone just loves to play with him. He's got a thing for cameras. Loves to smile whenever someone wants to take his picture.
Cute? Too cute.
Anyway, I finally got the Eid pictures off from my dad yesterday. I've no intention of putting them here except by request, but I do wish to introduce two newest members of my extended family. Hear hear!
Below, reaching two years old (if I'm not mistaken), Aiman. From my dad's side. Now he's too special. xD He's my cousin's son, first new generation, and also the youngest in the family now. Again, missing the little toddlers around, everyone just loves to play with him. He's got a thing for cameras. Loves to smile whenever someone wants to take his picture.
Cute? Too cute.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
